Definitely sounds like bipolar or something close. See a psychologist ASAP; faster cycles can be a warning sign. You’re not insane, you just have an unreliable narrator!

A few things I’ve learned from being married to a lady with bipolar for 16 years:

• it’s not your fault, but it is your responsibility
• not being able to trust your brain sucks, but knowing it can be a liar helps
• you can be happy and productive and have a normal life
• take your pills, especially if you don’t feel like it
• self-medicating has trade-offs - try to stick with TV or other distractions instead of things that can have consequences like drugs or sex

Good luck on your journey!

Solid Archer reference. Hegseth is now Other Barry in my discourse.

Conservatives: Won’t somebody think of the children?!

Subtext: as slave labor or sex objects or ideological battlefields or…